HOME FOR THE EQUINOX!

{We’re just a few weeks away from the Vernal Equinox, when the earth begins to wake for spring and night and day are of equal length. The dawn of change marks Rio’s death and is exactly equal and opposite the date of my birth; the autumnal equinox which puts the earth to bed in the fall.

Equal night. Equal day.
Equal dark. Equal light.

Me and my Rio…}

“Mom.. quit being so soft … remember … it’s a rainbow BRIDGE!! Grandma said you have to BUILD BRIDGES and you’re a STORYTELLER: — write me back into the script, you doofus. “

{RIO!!!!!!! You’re back!!!!!!!}

Mom you’re pathetic down there. Look at you. You’re a disaster without me! You don’t even know how great you’re doing! You are too smart to be this dumb.

{what’s it like living in a rainbow, Rio? Does it smell like skittles?! Can you float on clouds like Mario? You know how the earth is Rio. How are you, my baby Rio? }

I’d be better if you weren’t such a mess! Yes the clouds are like cotton candy sploot beds, and I HAVE A SPOT SAVED FOR YOU SPECIAL! No, it doesn’t smell like skittles; it’s more like …. Sweet tarts. But I can see all the colors now; and they let you eat all the cat turds here without having to go AWOL to find them. The canines are the rainbow bridge janitorial litter box maintenance crew! The cats love us here!!

{You lucky little guy. Keep my spot warm. I got a lot of work to do down here as you might have NOTICED. I don’t know how to run this place without you. It’s not the same. Crazy Town is not the same…. }

Mom! You dominated the integrity game; Crazy Town couldn’t be victorious if I were still alive. Don’t you see? Don’t you remember why I had to go??

{did I figure that out, Rio?}

When I was there, you were working so hard for me— you couldn’t think of yourself then. You couldn’t SEE you. I had to go because I came to teach you the hardest most beautiful lesson about death.

{have I learned it?}

I made a noble attempt but so far you’re iffy on your execution, Mom. I showed you how to lead and taught you to be proud of who you are. I taught you purpose; to forget about what you are not and what you cannot do and I taught you to overcome no matter what. I taught you to accept your inner me and you did. You love yourself because you loved me first. It was a trap! It’s your turn… you have to tell stories. Go effing tell stories, Mom!

{I’m already telling stories, Rio. I need you to come back and narrate for Crazy Town…}

You want me to narrate from the bridge? That’s a tall ask.

{yes! Bridges are connectors and protectors and passageways — you are a perfect fit!}

So you want me to TAKE OVER the narrative for crazy town?

{if you have that much time! }

You are really demanding when I’m dead. What kind of stories do you want me to tell?

{We need your perspective. You decide. Try one…}

I know a good one!! I wanna tell the story of how Cookie’s vulva is grossing you out.

{it’s not grossing me out, I’m just tired of SEEING SO MUCH OF IT. But that would be a funny story}

How about if I tell an ongoing mystery series called “Where did Mom lose her coffee cup this time?”

{that would be funny but … You’d have to also guess whether I’ll find it before it gets cold. }

Pshhh. You’ll never do that.

{there’s a lot to work out for the real storytelling. I gotta learn to write settings and plots and …}

…and blah blah blah. You already wrote a setting for this narrative: you’re in the beautiful dumpster fire that is Crazy town and I am floating on a rainbow that smells like candy and cat shit. I think that’s good enough for randomly picking up your phone and deciding to “bring me back” home and skirt your yearly sob fest…

{you see everything…RIO!… what about if you just start reporting in on events from the rainbow bridge and we wing it like everything else we write…}

Perfect plan, Mom. I’m glad to be back.

{I missed you the most. I’m so glad I can delude myself out of a grief meltdown come the 21st. }

ohhh you’ll still have the meltdown MOM!!

{you’re right—I forgot! What would I do without you! Kiss Farley for me and tell him to come to the mic every once in a while!}

He’s … not that nice.

{LMAO }